I’m Wuzherefirst an amoeba and I’m in your water supply.
I am really tough and I usually live in wet and warm places and
I will go to sleep when things get too cold or dry.

I am not bacteria, virus, or a plant.
Not an insect and smaller than an ant.
And I’m too tiny for you to see.

I am a complex one cell animal that is slow and I have big feet.
No, I don’t wear the latest kicks because I eat with my feet!
And boy do I like to eat!

I eat cells. Yes, cells. Any old kind will do as long as they’re warm and wet.
Guess what? You have quite a few cells that I haven’t met yet!

You jump into my home during the summer months and call yourself swimming and diving.
I swim in the water that goes up your nose and eat the cells that form the barrier between your nose and your brain and you will never know when I am arriving.

When I finish eating the membrane, I go inside your brain, vacation and continue eating like a zombie, but when I finish, I guess you know you won’t turn into a zombie, but I can make you dead because you will have many holes in your head.

You will just be a mammal walking around all over the place lost in space.
I just took over your brain as my new main vacation place.

You took over my home and declared it your water supply and now your brain is the new restaurant and vacation club that I occupy.

If I make it to your house through the faucet to visit, I can still snack on you when you use the water from the faucet to clean your contacts or get water in your eyes from the shower. You will just give me an extended lunch hour.

Just like the cobra that can blind you by spitting venom in your eyes, I am strong enough to make mammals die by eating through their eyes.

During the summer months when you like to picnic and drink water that you’re so sure it is clean. I am in that water you drank ready to really do my thing!

Your teeth can’t harm me and neither can the acid in your tummy, bile, digestive hormones, and antibodies. None of these things can defeat Wuzherefirst the Amoeba when I start to eat!

I will just eat until I have a happy tummy! Now while you won’t feel so well with your tummy ache and poop everywhere. I will be busy eating all of your cells without a worry or a care!

You must know that I’m not the only one in my home. I can make many sisters and brothers without a father or a mother. All I have to do is slowly split myself into two. My sisters and brothers can do that same trick too.

Amoeba, bacteria, and protozoa have been around on earth long before the animals that you see today. We have lasted longer than the dinosaurs, extinct birds and mammal fossils you have found.
Just remember that Wuzherefirst and all the other amoeba are still alive and hanging around.

Since you like to crash houses and haunt them on the sly, we decided to hang around and taunt you and your water supply!

Have a safe and happy Halloween!